Oh, Canada, eh
On the site I have a category called Mocking and a subcategory from that called Canada. Why? Because it’s there.
I live in one of the few areas of the United States ever invaded by a foreign power. I can stand on the shore of Lake Ontario, turn my gaze north towards Toronto, raise my fist and shout “Damn you, ya limey bastards! We’ll get you for that!” Two hundred years isn’t too long to carry a grudge.
Many of us locals are getting our revenge, however. We get on the bus or drive on over to Casino Niagara and leave our devalued dollars in their Canadian slot machines. Take that, you hosers, take our devalued dollars! The joke’s on you…
Now, I have written glowingly about the actions of the Canadian military in Afghanistan. They’re punching above their weight class and probably rank second to us in the number of Taliban sent to Allah.
Maybe the Brits are in there, but they seem to have this policy of “We won’t shoot at you and you only shoot at us a little”.
Now, French Canada, well, I have fond memories.
In the early 1970’s a Catholic girls high school in Quebec used to send a bunch of its students down to my college to interact with the French Club and those of us taking French. Us being a bunch of horny American young men.
I’m not sure if any of those girls followed the Montreal Expos or not. I can say that reaching second base with them was as easy as it was with the Expos.
Perhaps it was all a plot to corrupt us. French Canadian boobage.
Did I mention that Canada invaded us? Just checking.
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Strippers. Don’t forget the strippers. All the strippers in Niagra Falls, Ont. have french accents (real or pretend). Oh, the nights spent at the Crazy Horse in NFO, then back to Buffalo where the bars close at 4.